My friend Les Gold, star of the hit TV series Hardcore Pawn, gave a dynamic speech this week that left the audience mesmerized.   His opening line really struck me: “How bad do you want it?”

As products of a consumer-driven society, we want just about everything.  We want fancy cars, palatial homes, and exotic travel.  We also want perfectly toned bodies, extraordinary athletic abilities, a big circle of friends, dozens of hobbies, and a close-knit family.  Our wants are limitless.

The challenge becomes prioritization and sacrifice.  As the sage childhood advice proclaims, “You can have anything you want but you can’t have everything you want.”  Knowing that human desire surpasses the 24-hour-a-day limit, choosing what’s most important is critical.  Without that focus, your energies become defuse and you end up accomplishing very little.

“How bad do you want it?”  Les gets in the audience’s face with his trademark intensity.  He’s referring to your commitment to reaching your goals and questioning the sacrifices you’re willing to make in order to win.  The most successful people do what other won’t, not what others can’t.  If you want something but refuse to do whatever it takes to get there, it’s merely fanciful dreaming.  Those that truly commit to their goals and will walk through fire to achieve them are the ones that win in good times and bad.

Les works out seven-days-a-week at 5am.  I’m sure there are days he’d rather stay in his warm bed, but he’s willing to sacrifice short-term pleasure for long-term fulfillment.  Dealing with tough customers at his pawnshop empire can be difficult and often dangerous.  But he shows up every day.  Fearless.  Driven.  Committed.

It’s so easy to cast blame when we fall short.  Between the economy, governmental regulation, fierce competition, and “not enough time in the day”, there’s no shortage of excuses.  But when you’re busy moaning, someone else is busy winning.  They’re willing to own personal responsibility for their results.  Willing to do whatever it takes, no matter how distasteful, to achieve.  Are you?

When you combine intense focus with unbendable grit and determination, nearly anything is possible.  As you set out to make your biggest mark, you will undoubtedly need to make some tough sacrifices along the way.  If it were easy, everyone would be a champion.

Are you ready to fight through rain, sleet, and snow?  Are you ready to exert discipline and focus?  Are you ready to be relentless?

How bad do you want it?

A good friend of mine said something to me at dinner this week that really hit me: “Aim Up, Compare Down.”

So many of us drive ourselves crazy by comparing “up.” Rather than enjoying our own circumstances, we lust for the things and traits possessed by others. We crush our own spirit by comparing ourselves to those that are smarter, younger, better looking, more successful, taller, wealthier, better athletes, etc. Unfortunately, this is just a recipe for feeling like shit.

In always comparing up, we lose perspective of where we stand. Instead of appreciating what we are, we obsess about what we’re not. We fail to savor our accomplishments and natural gifts, always grasping for something more in a never-ending futile effort that depletes our confidence and sense of self.

Comparing down, in contrast, helps you realize and enjoy where you are in the moment. It helps you recognize that while there’s always room to grow on your path, you’ve already accomplished the things that only exist in the dreams of others. Sure, there’s always someone with a bigger boat, but never lose sight of those with much less.

I’m sure there are many different ways to interpret the idea of comparing down. To me, it’s not about comparing yourself to other people or being boastful. It’s about comparing “down” to a previous version of you. It’s about recognizing how far you’ve come and realizing that things could always be a lot worse.

Now comparing down isn’t an excuse to stop pushing ahead and striving. That’s where “aiming up” comes in. As far as I can tell, the purpose of life is to realize your full potential and make your biggest possible impact on the world. You won’t get there by aiming (or dreaming) small. Aiming at a target in front of you will propel you to play your best possible game. It will allow you seize the enormous opportunity that’s waiting for you.

So many of us have the formula backwards, don’t we? We aim down because we’re afraid of putting ourselves out there and failing. By playing it “safe”, we end up filled with regret for all the shots we never took. And to top it off, we compare “up.” Envy overwhelms us, starving our own sense of well-being and fulfillment. And with every step forward, we immediately seek something new and shiny to covet instead of appreciating our accomplishments in the moment.

It’s time to turn conventional thinking upside down. It’s time to embrace a fresh perspective that will push you to new heights while embracing the joy you’ve earned at each step along your path.

Forget the traditional approach. Aim Up, Compare Down.

Recently I had the privilege of delivering my third commencement speech. I love graduation ceremonies and what they symbolize: achievement, overcoming adversity, reaching the next level.

Addressing thousands of graduates is a daunting task. With only a few minutes to impart some lasting wisdom, what message would you deliver? I decided to share the 11 principles that have guided me since I wore that graduation robe many moons ago.

In preparing my remarks, I realized that these nuggets didn’t just apply to freshly minted grads; they apply to us all. These are the principles I live by and the philosophies that have enabled my own success. Here’s my advice for graduates, dropouts, young guns, and seniors alike:

1. Put Passion First – People will constantly tell you what you “should” do. Instead of doing what others expect, follow your dreams and your heart. You’ll be much happier, and you’ll make the world a better place too.

2. Build Your Creativity Muscle – This will be your most important skill, and it will allow you to thrive and win. Develop your creativity early and often – it will pay off big-time.

3. Don’t Stumble Over Something Behind You – Regret is the worst human emotion, since you can’t do a thing about the past. You’ll make lots of mistakes, which are nothing more than the portals of discovery. Fail fast, learn, and move on.

4. Leave it Better than You Found it – Every interaction, meeting, project, game, and relationship leaves you with a choice. You can add value or remove it. Do the right thing instead of the easy thing. You’ll be glad you did.

5. Reject Limits – Break free from limits that others try to impose on you. Your ideas, creativity and potential are nearly limitless. Reach for the edges.

6. “Do or Do Not, There is No Try” – This is a quote from Star Wars’ Yoda. Simply put, commit to your dreams and do whatever it takes to reach them.

7. Playing it Safe is Irresponsibly Dangerous - The history books never talk about people that lived small. Those that take risks, shatter complacency, and create their own future are the ones that make the biggest difference. Make your own mark, and never let fear hold you back from your true potential.

8. Embrace Change – The world will continue to change at breathtaking speeds. Those that get locked into one way of thinking get passed by. Standing still is the beginning of the end, so always stay ahead of the curve.

9. Be Appreciative and Humble – Einstein once wrote, “You can live each day as if everything is a miracle, or as if nothing is.” True ‘dat!

10. Be a Lifelong Learner – Continuously sharpen your mind and devour knowledge. Learning constantly will enable success in every area of your life.

11. Have fun! – Life is meant to be savored. Enjoy every sip, sound, and bite.
We all face many challenges, which is why a few guiding principles can serve as a helpful North Star. Play you biggest game and seize the enormous opportunity that’s waiting for you.

No tassel or funny hat required.

In 2005, I found myself in a very desirable position. I had started a company from scratch six years before, and I was delighted to see it achieve some real success. ePrize had become the dominant player in the online promotions industry, organizing sweepstakes and loyalty programs for clients like Coca-Cola, Disney, P&G, adidas and Microsoft.

But then something happened confirming my worst, unspoken fears. A new company entered the promotions business, and our market position was threatened. Every time we tried to land a new client, our rival won the business by underpricing us and offering more sophisticated solutions. They seemed to have come up with a secret way of winning at lower cost yet with higher efficiency and more creativity. They stole our clients, as if by magic. My nightmare had come true.

I knew right away that our new rival, Slither Corporation, was out to kill us. Soon, they were bigger than us, they moved faster, and – though I hated to admit it – they seemed smarter. They never had a down quarter. They appeared unbeatable.

It was inevitable – Slither was going to eat our lunch. Unless we upped our game, and out-Slithered Slither.

But here’s the thing. The Slither Corporation doesn’t actually exist. I made them up. Slither is our fictive nemesis, our imaginary bad guys. To defeat comfort and complacency, I decided that our team needed a wake-up call, so I launched our make-believe competitor at the point we felt unstoppable. The goal: to ensure that we stayed at peak performance, remained humble, and pushed our creative boundaries.

Rather than battling a poorly performing company to make us feel good about ourselves, Slither was launched to fictitiously undercut our prices, steal our customers, compete more efficiently than seemed possible, and, all the while, enjoy margins that made us green with envy.

Slither became a key part of our culture. We intercepted internal memos from Slither that gave us insight into their strategy. Our team members were asked questions such as, “What’s the one thing that your counterpart at Slither does better than you?” Slither even invaded our company one day, dressed in costumes that represented the opposite of our cultural values.

In today’s challenging times, you probably have real competitors to worry about. But inventing your own ideal enemy and then thinking deeply about how to conquer them can be a powerful technique to drive change and innovation. It will help you focus on the possibilities and remove internal political cloudiness.

Unleash your own fictitious archenemy, and use it as a platform for reinvention. It will help you challenge yourself to reach new heights, drive urgency, and unlock new ideas. This imaginary battlefield will better equip you to win at the real thing.

Throughout my career, my favorite saying has always been: “Someday, a company is going to come along and put us out of business. It might as well be us.” Creating your own version of Slither will help you do just that. Disrupt or be disrupted.

When Darth Vader tried to persuade young Skywalker to join the dark side, it wasn’t a very compelling proposition. Who wants to wear black, talk weird, and live like a monster? If the dark side were that unappealing, it would be easy to say no.

But that’s not what modern-day darkness looks like at all. Instead it is shiny, juicy, and tempting. It comes perfectly packaged and marketed directly to our soft spots. That delicious candy bar or cheeseburger that poisons your body and robs your vitality. The expensive handbag that you have to have, but only drives you deeper into debt after momentary pleasure. That relationship that’s all surface and no substance.

In fact, the dark side looks anything but dark. It is appealing in every way and is designed to test you. Anyone can say no to living in a cave. It’s much harder to say no to the illustrious temptations that adeptly lure you in to their evil grips.

It often comes down to small choices. Should you watch trash reality TV or read something inspiring? Should you hit the bar or hit the gym? Should you perpetuate a relationship that provides nothing more than momentary indulgences or seek a partner that helps you reach the next level?

At nearly every turn you’ll face scrumptious temptations. The good news is that you get to make each choice along the way. Momentary pleasure or sustainable fulfillment. The easy thing or the right thing. Darkness or light.

If you think about it, your life becomes simply the product of all the choices you make. How important is it to achieve your full potential? To fulfill your long-term dreams? To make your biggest possible impact?

If you prioritize true fulfillment, you’ll have to make some tough choices along your journey. You’ll need to have the strength to say no to overwhelming temptation in order to say yes to your real calling. Here in 2012, we don’t conquer evil with light sabers. Today your weapon is purpose, passion, and commitment. You’ll win the fight with inner focus rather than outer strength.

The dark side is only getting more alluring. Which means your commitment to excellence is needed more than ever. Don’t be outsmarted by the hollow temptress. Stand firm in your place of power and watch these enticing shams crumble into dust.

As the dark side becomes yummier, it’s time for you to strengthen your resolve.

Master Yoda will be proud.

I’ve noticed more and more that the competitors in most industries are nearly indistinguishable. I honestly can’t tell you the last place I filled up my car with gas, the last brand of cheese I purchased, or the brand of my wireless router. From credit card companies to soft drinks to mutual funds, so many products and services are swimming in a sea of sameness.

Those that try to appeal to everyone end up delighting no one. What’s the point of going to market if you can’t stand for something? Most brands are like needy teenagers, desperately trying to blend in with the crowd. In turn, we care little about the companies we support and often make decisions based on who has the best deal-of-the-day since true differentiation is nonexistent.

And then there’s Kulula Airlines, a South African discount flight provider. In an industry where even the peanuts are identical from carrier to carrier, Kulula stands out with a personality cleverer than Conan O’Brien. Check out some pictures of their planes:

How fun, right? But it isn’t just about paint – their edgy brand personality permeates the entire organization. For example, here are some actual comments heard over the PA system on Kulula flights:

“Thank you for flying Kulula. We hope you enjoyed giving us the business as much as we enjoyed taking you for a ride.”

And from the pilot during his welcome message: “Kulula Airlines is pleased to announce that we have some of the best flight attendants in the industry. Unfortunately, none of them are on this flight!”

After an extremely hard landing, the Flight Attendant said, “Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to The Mother City. Please remain in your seats with your seat belts fastened while the Captain taxis what’s left of our airplane to the gate!”

Part of a flight attendant’s arrival announcement: “We’d like to thank you folks for flying with us today. And, the next time you get the insane urge to go blasting through the skies in a pressurized metal tube, we hope you’ll think of Kulula Airways.”

“Ladies and gentlemen, if you wish to smoke, the smoking section on this airplane is on the wing. If you can light ‘em, you can smoke ‘em.”

To Kulula, this stuff isn’t just marketing hyperbole. It’s WHO they are. It is their culture and personality; an authentic message about having fun and not taking themselves too seriously. And as a result, they stand apart from all the other nameless, faceless airlines. They dared to be different. They let their creativity shine. Their imagination is viewed as jet fuel to success rather than a liability that must be controlled.

What’s your brand personality? The world has become too competitive not to have something that’s worth talking about. If you or your company has the personality of a pet rock, it’s time to shake things up.  If you don’t, your competitors surely will.

Question of the week: If you could change five things about your brand, messaging (both internal and external), positioning, or approach… what would you do differently?

Bonus question: Can you really afford not to make these changes?

It’s often said that the most successful people focus more on the questions they ask than the statements they make. Asking the right questions can unlock volumes of knowledge, wisdom, and insight. Yet we’re often so busy telling, that we miss out on the power of asking. While this applies to communication with other people, I’m talking about the internal conversation we have with ourselves.

So often, that internal dialog is sabotaging. If you speak to friends the same way you speak to yourself, you’d quickly end up with a long list of enemies. “I’m not smart enough”, “I can’t do it”, “That was a stupid thing I just said”, “I’m a phony”, “I’ll probably get fired”, “He/she is going to dump me.”

Your inner pit bull ends up wreaking havoc and holding you back from reaching your true potential. It’s a terrible injustice when you spend your reflective moments filled with fear and doubt. Instead of a loving coach to ourselves, we often end up being an angry, mud-slinging jerk. A warden who ensures we stay imprisoned – demanding mediocrity. We become our own biggest detractors.

Rather than a bunch of new age, self-help babble, try asking yourself these four powerful questions to liberate your soul and set your ideal course.

1. If there was zero chance of failure, what would you do?

2. What are the three habits you need to change to take your game to the next level?

3. Who are the people in your life you need to spend more time with? Less time?

4. Is the game plan you are currently running the most direct path to your destiny?

Telling yourself empty compliments lacks authenticity and impact and has the same effect of someone complimenting you on your outfit that you know is a fashion disaster. Real confidence and empowerment comes from knowing you are on the right path, and having the discipline to stay focused even when it isn’t convenient.

By asking yourself these questions in an honest, introspective manner, the game plan you need to pursue will become as clear as the latest 3D, HD, LED, 1080p TV. Then it becomes a choice: To follow your life’s work or to cave to your detractors. And I’m talking about both external naysayers and the likely biggest critic in your life – you.

When you’re on the right path, the negative self-talk evaporates and gives way to confidence and power.

You don’t need a shrink, life-coach, boss, talk show host, politician, parent, or infomercial spokesperson to tell you how to live your life. When you go deep on these questions, you’ll find the answers you need to put a plan in motion and seize your purpose.

Send the critic out for a long walk, ask the right questions, and get busy with manifesting your true potential. Everyone else’s is already taken.

Many of us chase success, only to find it to be an elusive tease. We say to ourselves if “I could HAVE what I want (money, fame, power, clothes, spouse, car, house, etc.) then I could DO the things I want, which, in turn, would allow me to BE who I truly am.”

We think Have, Do, Be. Unfortunately, that’s backwards.

When you study the most successful and happy people, they run the reverse model. They first focus on who they are (philosophy, character, culture) and are uncompromising on BEING true to those beliefs. This allows them to DO the things they want. Because they are authentic and follow their destiny, they end up HAVING what they need. The HAVING is simply a byproduct of first BEING and then DOING.

If you really want to maximize your true potential, turn the conventional approach upside down. BE true to your core beliefs, DO the things you care about, and the HAVE will take care of itself.

In terms of BEING, a good starting point is to write your own eulogy. When it’s all said and done, how do you want to be remembered? As a selfish, workaholic jerk? A fear-laden rule follower? A liar? Most of us want to exude strong character, contribute to humanity, and express our creativity. You don’t need a new Porsche or a 5-bedroom house to begin being a person you can admire.

When you think about DOING, forget about the status quo and what you think you “ought” to do. Instead, follow a path that is both inspired and inspiring. Step away from what you perceive as “safe” since you only have so many years to make your mark. Start by asking yourself these seven questions:

1. What do you love to do the most?
2. What gives you the most satisfaction and joy?
3. When do you feel like you are making the biggest impact?
4. What activities most energize you?
5. What would you do if there were no possibility you could fail?
6. What are you doing when you lose track of time?
7. If you could be remembered for one thing, what would it be?
If you’ve identified a career path that is radically different from your current gig, it’s time to take a hard look in the mirror and consider seizing your true calling. If you don’t, who will?

As for the HAVE, it will take care of itself. If you follow your passion and purpose, you’ll get all the stuff you need. By focusing on being whom you are meant to be and doing what you are meant to do, the having will end up being a whole lot less important anyway.

Stop with Have, Do, Be. It’s time to Be, Do, Have.

Your mind has hidden superpowers!

What does the power of placebo pills have to do with realizing your dreams? Both depend on your mind. Your mind can take a sugar pill and cure cancer. And it can take an idea – say, a personal computer in everyone’s home – and make it a reality. It just takes belief – and action: http://bit.ly/ak6IzT

Brilliantly creative healthcare advertising

Sometimes it seems like the only news coming out of healthcare is bad. It’s all about complexity, cost, and, well, screwups. But there are some areas of healthcare that are pacing the rest of the world economy, and advertising is one of them. These ads will frighten, laugh, and surprise you into good health. http://tinyurl.com/y9q3ezv

Brainstorming made easy

Having a hard time coming up with some new ideas? John Michel has made it easy for you with this idea-generating pinwheel. Just press the button, and a new idea comes up – and it’s absolutely free. http://tinyurl.com/ksvnmx

Even a contact lens?

People often use the excuse that their field is not a very creative one. That just means that it’s time for creative people to get to work! In this case, if you thought innovation was over with in the contact lens field, think again. Here’s something you have never seen before: http://tinyurl.com/kpao66

There are so many powerful business lessons we can learn from the world of jazz. This fluid, improvisation art form is all about taking risks and trying new things. Going out on limb can be scary, but it is where the magic happens. Extending yourself outside your comfort zone is where the best rewards will be discovered.

Jazz is also about listening. Listening to your fellow musicians, the audience, and your own creative voice. In business, that means listening to your team, your customers, your competitors, your industry, your suppliers, the latest trends and best practice, and of course, your own creativity. Through focused listening comes adaptation. Allowing the environment and your collaborators to influence the outcome as a group. Seeking inspiration and creativity from others, and adapting in real-time to your own Creative Challenge.

The most in-demand jazz musicians are not typically the ones with the most blazing technique or dazzling solo ability. The ones who always find work are those that support the collective output rather than being a diva. What makes jazz performances memorable is not breathtaking speed or technique; it is all about establishing a connection and crafting true, artistic, musical expression. It’s about creating something special that resonates with your audience.

The same is true in the business world. The best leaders and the people who get promoted are not selfish, me-centric show-offs. Instead, the new era of business rewards those that collaborate and work to serve their colleagues and their customers. Individual brilliance is great, but purposeful group engagement is worshiped. Any one person can be strong, but a tightly integrated group becomes unstoppable. As the African proverb states, “When spider webs unite, they tie up a lion.”

Finally, look out for what I call “The Jazz Trap”. This is the situation where musicians get so caught up in a look-what-I-can-do mindset that they lose connection with their audience. These musicians add complexity for the sake of it, and are so busy showing off their technical brilliance that their art suffers (as does anyone who happens to be listening).

Don’t forget that your creativity must always be directed at a specific business challenge. You should be focused on solving problems in the best way, not the most complex way. There have been many ad campaigns that have won awards but failed to sell any products. Let your creativity flow completely unrestricted throughout the creative process, but don’t forget to ultimately select the solution that will create the best results, not the one that is the most dazzling.

Jazz improvisation is like a fluid conversation among friends; you make it up as you go. There’s no script, and the best discussions are never rehearsed. Think of yourself as a jazz musician, taking risks and using these techniques to improvise fresh and original ideas. Imagination will flow. Inspiration will hit. Sparks with ignite. And that blank page will be no match for your unbridled creativity.

Click here to view the entire six-part series, Creative Sparks from the World of Jazz